Rosa Zoghbi is a young woman whose heart has been captivated by the love of Jesus. She has boldly stepped out in faith over and over again as Jesus has called her to follow Him. She is single by choice and will not settle for less than what God has for her in any area of her life. She is strong, honest, and vulnerable. You will be blessed by her heart as she shares her heart with you today. -Pastor Cindy Grasso
Last week, God taught me some amazing things. Before I tell you what they are, I need to tell you what a perfectionist I am and how hard I am on myself because of it. I am the graphic designer of a beautiful organization that loves God deeply and I care for every individual who is a part of it. I have made it my personal mission to bring God’s vision for this place to life and do so with excellence. I want perfection and I want it because I want to glorify God through my work. I can be rather relentless in it and often feel the sting of failure because of it.
Can anyone out there relate?
Recently I was asked to design a book that will help people understand the core values of our church. I loved the idea of it and have been working on it for the last 6 months. It is a yearly planner meant to be used as a tool to help people grow into who God has created them to be and we wanted to have it in time for our Volunteer Conference last weekend.
At the beginning of the month, I found a company in California that could print them within our budget and get them here on time for the event! Yes! Everything was going along nicely until the books didn’t arrive when they were supposed to. VolCon was days away and we needed those books!
I panicked. I had never worked with this company before and I didn’t know much about them. They seemed like a good fit for us but now I was doubting myself for choosing them. They didn’t provide a tracking number, I didn’t know if we would get the books at all and I was stressing out about it. What really made the process stressful was my lack of trust and thinking that I was strong enough to deal with it (instead of entrusting it to God who was really the one in control of it all).
After all my stressing, after all the conversations back and forth, the company did the unexpected to make up for missing the deadline – they put the shipment on a plane and delivered the books to the church in a long black Limo the next day!
Wait… What? Yes, in a Limo! This is something I would never ever, even with all of the definitions of excellence and perfection would have ever thought of. I was flabergasted and in all of the years I have been working with design and production, I have never experienced anything like it.
I was in awe and filled with the knowledge that God used this situation to teach me this lesson:
When I let go of the things I can’t control, I give room for God to bring order to the chaos, take care of the details, and I get the opportunity to witness the true perfection of His love at work.
Do you know that God can bring order to your chaos and can do more than you can ask or imagine if you trust Him?
Once I got the books in my hands and took off the plastic wrap, I did what all good production people do: I inhaled the aroma of a freshly printed book. I love that smell. Anyway, as I flipped through the pages and got a good look at them, I noticed that the design was off. Not by much but definitely not perfect. To the eyes of many, this will not be noticeable, but to the eyes of the one who created the design (myself), it was evident.
The inner critic of my perfectionist self began to mumble and grumble. I wanted it to be perfect and was disappointed. Ugh.
At that moment I wasn’t focused on the wonder of delivery or the beauty of the book itself but on the imperfection I knew was there.
As soon as I realized what I was doing, I went to God and asked Him to help me. As I poured my perfectionist heart out to Him, He began to show me what I really needed to see:
God didn’t need it to be “perfect” to use it to fulfill His purpose.
Yes, the planner had an imperfect design but it would still fulfill its purpose. Its main purpose wasn’t to be perfect, its purpose was to be used as a tool to help people connect with God and grow into who He created them to be.
Do you know that you don’t have to be perfect to fulfill your purpose?
This is a lesson I am learning and relearning all the time. As I held the planner in my hands, He reminded me again, “I don’t need you to be perfect, I need you resting in my hands so I can use you for My purposes.”
God doesn’t need you to be perfect, He just needs you in His hands to use for His purpose.
I know what you are saying, “I want to be perfect, I want to serve Him with excellence, I want to grow and change and get better”.
Then I realized something else as I held that book in my hands. If something needs to be changed in the book, the book is not able to do a single thing on its own to make this happen. I am the only one who can do it because I am the one who designed it.
The One who designed you is the one who can change you.
Do you know that if something needs to change in your design that you won’t be able to do it on your own either? Only the One who designed you can do that. And because of what Jesus did for us through the cross and the resurrection, our Father in heaven has full access to us and He will do it.
“Be energetic in your life of salvation, reverent and sensitive before God. That energy is God’s energy, an energy deep within you, God himself willing and working at what will give him the most pleasure.”
Philippians 2: 13 MSG
But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12:9
My Beloved friend, as imperfect as we all are, God loves us, He chose us, and He wants to use us, not for how we look, or what we know, or how skilled we think we are. He chose us because we are His, and He wants us to experience His joy by embracing our weaknesses and rejoicing in Him as witnesses of His great power and grace.
– Rosa Z